I was going to have a second lesson with Javier and Andrea because I enjoyed them so much as people, and I felt like I got something out of the previous lesson, but I’ve decided to cancel it.
Not only is it quite a lot of money for me, but last week’s lesson got me stressing out about my embrace a little bit, and after getting a good lecture from an old milonguero friend, Pedro, about just being myself and being happy with my dancing the way it is, I realized that I do like my embrace the way it is, and I do like my dancing the way it is.
I’ve already found Tina. I just want to dance Tina. And I like my embrace - I meet the right guy on the dance floor and it fits - it just works. The embrace that Javier shared with me doesn’t really work with most of the men I love to dance with. It has made it much easier to dance with certain men I know in milongas, and I am grateful for that, but really, I like the way I embrace in general. I’m gonna be Tina. Which is what I think Javier was trying to get at in the lesson, even if he did give me something different to work with. Same message.
I don’t want to “improve” or be “better” or “good” at Tango. I want to be “Tina” at Tango. It’s not about competition, or improvement or progress - it’s about expressing yourself. I think I express myself just fine. Will I want a lesson in the future? Maybe - I’m not an absolutist, and Julio and Corina will be in Seattle in July while I am briefly there which is tough to say no to ;-). For now I’m going to really enjoy just being Tina in the dance, and I’m going to enjoy loving Tango.
I should note, to Javier’s credit, that the lesson was more centered around my attitude and self-confidence (read: body confidence) in the dance than it was about technique, and he too said that he like to see more Tina in the dance. Then again, he doesn’t know me the way the guys in the milongas do. We’ve never danced together socially. And I was also nervous to dance with Javier. I already am Tina in the dance. As I said, maybe that’s what he wanted me to realize in the lesson - that I’ve just got to be myself.
I’m going to recommend them as teachers to anyone who is curious. They really are great. I’m just at a time in my life where lessons kind of mess up my dancing. That’s because of where I am emotionally, mentally, spiritually, etc. I’m going through a natural evolution. My life experience is what affects my Tango right now.
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5 users responded in this post
Tina,
“You dance who you are.”
And tango is supposed to be FUN!
Good for you!
xxx,
c
Tina, this is such an important post. So many of us keep on taking classes to the point of neurosis, and it is reflected in how we dance. We get completely sidetracked by “perfecting” details and become far removed from the divine connection. Tango is supposed to be fun. The only thing that really needs correcting is when our dancing pulls our partners off balance. Everything else - forgetaboutit!
Great post, good thought. Alan was saying that every time he takes a lesson it messes up his dance. I think we still need some consistent and careful instruction, which we are getting, but we realize we need to keep our dancing seperate in a way, and to let go of the instruction and all those words and thoughts, when we are dancing. Also it takes a long time to absorb really great teaching, and it is wise to take some time. And yes to fun!
Great post. You have liberated yourself from the notion that you necessarily need to be like some teacher or to follow a certain rule/trend.
Maybe I’ll realize I am unique as a dancer in some years…
It sounds to me as if you’re in the perfect place with your dance.. Once you’re happy the way you are, there’s nothing more to do than enjoy it and offer to share it with anyone who wants to join in.
I’ve found that lessons can be quite disruptive to my dance which is why I rarely take them now, preferring to to just try things out on the dance floor when the opportunity arises. If I do take a lesson, I will do what the teacher wants during the lesson, then only take the things I find interesting or useful beyond the lesson.
And thanks for blogging. I love reading about other’s thoughts and feelings related to tango. It helps me put my own thoughts and feelings into place.
David
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