Bella Figura/Brutta Figura in the milongas

(UPDATE: The two examples below are based on true stories that I witnessed with my own eyes.)

Dear innocent, unsuspecting newbie to the traditional milongas of Buenos Aires, a few suggestions to make your transition into milonguera life a bit smoother.

1. It’s winter in Buenos Aires and very cold at night, so you subject yourself to throwing on a pair of trousers under that dress for the cold commute between home and the milonga.  I totally understand that and have done it myself.  We all do it.  When it’s cold it’s cold.

But what makes you think it’s logical and classy to change OUT of your trousers in front of everyone at the milonga?  What makes you think we want to be distracted from cabeceo-ing to watch you hike up your dress and pull down your pants?  And I know you think you are being discreet, but the traditional milongas are very well-lit, and do you think for a minute that the men don’t notice it?  Because they do.  If only you knew what they were thinking.  Then again, maybe you don’t want to know.

Maybe this was okay to do at your practica in your hometown.  But you’re not there anymore.  You’re in Buenos Aires.  And you’re not at a practica you are at a milonga.  Here, it’s about how you present yourself.  People here make a special occasion of their favorite Saturday night milonga.  Look around you at how people behave.  They dress in nice, clean clothes, they smell good, they present themselves nicely. Ever hear of the Italian expression, La Bella Figura? (Making a good impression, basically…) Well it applies here too, in terms of how you behave and present yourself in the milongas.  That’s just the way it is.

Tip: the bathroom is right there.  Just a few steps away.  This means that when you arrive you can saunter over to the ladies’ room and pull down your trousers to your heart’s content.  Your friends at the milonga thank you for politely observing this.  If you have a problem with this or wish to leave said trousers on under your dress (something I must admit I have never understood), maybe traditional milongas are not for you.  Try Villa Malcolm. It’s much more casual, and also very dark.

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2. Some folks have an issue about dancers changing their shoes at the table.  I honestly don’t care where you change yours shoes as long you are discreet and there is enough space for you to do so without knocking your head into the table next to you and causing water to spill.  But what I DO have an issue with is this:  do you really think it’s attractive to hoist your foot on your knee and rub foot powder into your foot, between your toes, all around, put your tango shoes on and then get up to dance without even washing your hands?  Ick!

Tip:  Well, I think it goes without saying.  But I’ll say it anyway:  If you must rub any sort of substance into your feet, do so in the ladies room and WASH YOUR HANDS.

I know there are a lot of codigos to remember in the traditional milongas, but it doesn’t take a set of rules to know what’s simply logical.  The above behaviors I have mentioned don’t even need codigos, they are just basic common sense.

And now you are just about ready to milonguear…